Fumbling with words

I went to see the Tok Kadi today.. Ustaz Ishak. The one who is supposed to supervise my akad nikah session. I felt rather prepared, no conceit meant; pre-empted by my sister, and two of my other friends who either were or will be under him and they have all gone through the interview session with the ustaz. It all sounded pretty okay..the interviews I mean.

So before the Jumaat Prayer, we went straight to his house, along with my dad and my nosy fiancé whom I told not to follow but insisted he would anyhow. It was pretty calm at first, but I was slightly nervous, because although I may have anticipated the questions he may ask (he pretty much asks the same questions to everyone mentioned above), he didn’t look like he’d be a very lenient person. Warm face, but stern looking. There’s some irony in it. Warm but stern, yes. But that’s what he looked like. Maybe also, because my fiancé was also there with me, it made me a little jittery.

It started pretty easy at first. He asked if I wanted to get married? I suppose that was meant to establish my willingness, that I was not forced or sold into this marriage, so I said yes. Then he started asking the more serious questions.. To recite the shahadah and give its meaning, Istighfar, and selawat (say blessing unto the Prophet) each of it 3 times (expected). My voice was pretty soft, wrecking with nerves, but I aced it. Then he asked me what does it mean to Istighfar (unexpected), and I replied to ask for forgiveness from the Almighty. I apparently got that right. Then he asked me to recite the Al-Fatihah (expected). I did, faster at first and he said I’m too fast and asked me to start again, slower this time. So I started again, slower. Then came the last part (waladdha^lin) when I was done, he asked me how many harakah it requires and I fumbled a bit. But eventually I got it right, but he proceeded to tell me anyhow that if anyone reads anything less than 6 harakah it is considered wrong and you should not follow. Then he asked me to recite another Surah, at random (expected). Of all the many easy ones I can think of, the only one that stuck to my mind was Surah Ad-Dhuha. So I read it, and aced that too, until he asked what it meant (UNEXPECTED). It was to be the second time I stalled with my answer, because I did not stop fidgeting the whole time and anything even slightly ever so remotely off my expectations made me more nervous. My dad hinted with the sunat prayer in the morning and I said, “Waktu pagi”? and he nodded, saying yes, dhuha means the period in the morning between sunrise and the time before noon where the sun is right on top of the head. Then the rukun nikah (expected) and I think that was all. I’m not sure if I left anything out. All in all, it was okay, I guess, though I fidgeted the whole time at least I didn’t fail it. Although I must say, I can’t help feeling like I was asked more questions than any of the ones I know of who went to see him. With a few unexpected questions, I managed to at least get to the end of it unscathed, finally calmed a little when he was done asking.

Fiance can’t help but laugh at what a nervous wreck I’d been, and I told him, “yeah, wait till its your turn..” hihi.. Now that the most important thing is done, I can go back to settling the rest of the preparations for the wedding.